How To Get Him To Commit Without Chasing Or Ultimatum?
How to get him to commit? That’s the question most women have in their heads at some point in the relationship. I teach how to inspire men to commit without bringing up the talk, in fact without doing much of anything at all ’cause she’s basking in her feminine essence. A high value woman doesn’t need to do that. A high-value woman is what makes men want to commit, because she’s too good to lose.
I’m excited to hear every day how the women who read my book and are in my private groups are reporting real results in their lives. They’re either reuniting with their exes, or get the commitment from men they want with either their formerly emotionally unavailable man (EUM) or a new guy after leaving their EUM or are just plain happier enjoying a single life dating different adoring guys with a newly found source of self-love and self-confidence within themselves.
They have unleashed their feminine power. This power is so mesmerizing and devoid of the old familiar anxiety and insecurities.
Yep, anxiety and insecurities are attraction killers. That’s how you always seem to attract guys you are not interested in, ’cause you could care less what they think. You are devoid of any agenda that emits the low energetic frequency of longing, manipulation and desperation.
This power is the very thing that makes a man want to commit to a woman.
Take this one, from my client Manda who recently got her emotionally unavailable guy to step up and claim her after following my tools and principles (and after so much resistance from her that resulted in her blocking me a few times on Facebook):
“Hi Hun thought I would again reach out to you again with positive feedback and an apology. So I took your advice and moved on well trying to not put my eggs in one basket and five weeks later Brad came back to me confessing his love showing me he filed for divorce which is finalized this month and that he wants exclusivity. Of course at first I took it as a lip service but one month later all is well and moving forward. I love this man, it’s worth a shot so yes you’re right and I apologize profusely to you for not heeding. I’m still dealing with my anxiety and anxious attaching as I’m regaining this man’s trust but Brad has helped through leaps and bounds! His ex knows about me and is moving on and she did start trouble but he stood up to her and said back off!! So I now have the love of my life and I’m still dealing with insecurities but your process does work.
We have also talked about marriage kids moving in together next year things are moving forward.
Basically I fought with myself for a long time about the reality of my EUM (emotionally unavailable man) situation. I always thought I wasn’t good enough and that he never loved me. He only wanted sex!! I should have listened to Kat more but in the end I was having a war with myself and suffering a lot.
I deleted Kat, took things personally and also was very depressed! Why wasn’t this man stepping up??!! Then I just instinctively gave up and began Internet dating, met a guy, hit it off, dated exclusively a month and my EUM was gone! Now this guy was great then began doing some shady stuff. In that time my EUM emailed saying I miss you. I thought stuff you, too little to late even though secretly I missed my best friend!
Things fizzled with new guy and my EUM began declaring his love for me, the words falling off his lips. It freaked me out and I was quite shocked he also filed for divorce and explained that he needed this big shake up to realize that he couldn’t live without me.
He also told me he had been in love with me for months but was scared as he had so much baggage from his ex!! Now I took a chance after his romantic wooing me back and seeing where things go. We are exclusive. I’m also apart of his children’s life now and he is meeting my family next week we plan to move in in a year’s time even though I’ve been dating over year and half, it’s only a month exclusiveness so I wanna take it slow!!
The amazing feeling of having the man I’ve loved for so long say it back proves that leaning back works. You can’t push a man to want or love you. I had to nurture me!!”
Miranda is learning how to get him to commit!
Manda is still working with me so she doesn’t relapse to her old self-defeating pattern and habits. I’m seeing her getting stronger and more secure each day relying on her feminine power of leaning back.
My other book reader and active member of our growing community is Melissa. She has a pattern of getting anxious and insecure each time she starts dating a guy until she read my ebook and religiously practices the principles I teach. She recently wrote on her FB wall:
“I realize I’ve been single for a short time compared to some so haven’t had time to become jaded or bitter about dating. I also decided to treat dating as a training ground, not a hunting ground. Big difference in how much fun you have (and the quality of people you attract) by making that simple distinction. And the best part is it’s authentic… never realized how feminine I am until now. —feeling blessed.”
“Training ground” is one of my very empowering principles that makes a woman a feminine goddess men adore. It is the opposite of a “hunting ground” that unfortunately many women operate on. It is devoid of any agenda or goal-drivenness. She is not only a goddess in training, she lives it now and enjoying herself so much in the process it raises her vibrations. She is now the understands the dynamics as to how to get him to commit.
And just when you are at the peak of the enjoyment of being such a goddess, some (lucky) guy will cut your stint short by claiming you. That’s how it works. That was how it worked with me.
And my boyfriend tells me everyday how much he loves me. He told me yesterday, “You’ve been nothing but magic since the day I met you. I’m so lucky. You really are the love of my life.”
Melissa also wrote in the groups: “Katarina speaks of making men your training ground. Was talking to a new guy Friday night about mistakes women make in relationships. He said I sound like one in a million. Of course I am. LOL. Because I truly love men and don’t think of them as hairy women. That I don’t focus on the outcome or the future and just let things unfold and don’t try to control everything. If I’m remembering correctly, anyway.
So I decided that one piece of being that one in a million is to be the best sex any man has ever had. (Or as close as I can get to that, anyway.) So asked current guy if he would teach me everything he knows, and he agreed. More goddess training…
I am excited. I dreaded it at first, but was listening to two friends who have been single a long time and are jaded. But I’m having a wonderful time… and I have several to choose from. Quite a change from the nerdy brain in high school and college who never dated.
P.S. he says I am the only woman he’s ever known who was so cool and laid back with no expectations. He’s 49.”
There is nothing more attractive to a guy than a soft, confident, happy, leaning-back woman who accepts and understands guys as they are. Melissa really knows how to work it these days. At the end of the day, women like that are the ones who get commitment from men EFFORTLESSLY, not the gorgeous ones.
Then there is Tara who wrote in the group: “For so long I fought what Katarina was saying about leaning back. It was too simple. It was a game. It was not at independent women does. It went against my belief of going after what you want. I am reporting now that in my life (I can only speak for myself and my life situation) I was wrong. Dead wrong. Leaning back works. It is miraculous. So I fight the urge and I will continue doing so. To a point. Until the one comes along that is meant to be. Thanks Kat!”
Tara is not unique, most women don’t know the seductive power of leaning back. I didn’t either till only recently. Till one insight led to another during my “stint” with my EUM. Now I’m comfortable to say that I have figured this out to a T.
Feminists will hate this but ultimately guys love demure women with a touch of assertiveness when needed. They connect to a woman who feels womanly to them. Don’t reverse it. These are the women that men commit to.
And on that note, it’s actually easy to get a man to commit. Men just love women they can lead. It just makes life easier for them. They don’t need another competitor. They have enough competition and stresses in the world, when they come home to their woman they want peace. Men and commitment really aren’t that complicated
That’s basically how Anna got her man to claim her only after four dates as well:
“We left to go to his friends BBQ get together. He introduced me to all of his friends and their family. I was surprised and enjoyed meeting everyone even though I can’t remember all of their names. One of the oldies commented that I will be quizzed on who’s who, jokingly. Everyone was very nice and I felt welcomed.
I didn’t think much of it until his friend’s sister’s daughter asked him if I was his gf and he said yes. Wow! It works, Katarina :).
Around 8 pm, we all went to the park to watch the fireworks. Also, Matt’s sister was there to meet us. He introduced me to his sis who seems to know so much about me. She’s really pretty and nice. More of their friends friends arrived and I was introduced as Matt’s gf :).
It was the first time he held my hands and our first kiss. I had a great time. I closed my eharmony account simply because I just want to focus on us now that we are exclusive. Thanks Kat :). All I did was focus on myself, no expectations, and repeated to myself over and over that I’m a goddess and the most desirable woman alive whether he pick me or another match.
Still surprised that he picked me!”
And then there is Maha, who left her EUM and five months later met her current guy who claimed her only after 6 weeks.
“Well just spent 2 days with my guy, phew what a weekend!! Of opening emotionally, spiritually, physically..it’s been big and he is sooooo available and he’s asked me to be his girlfriend…..!! I didn’t say YES yet..still processing but our hearts opened to each other and although I was scared on Saturday, now Monday night I feel more at ease and am learning to open my heart to LOVE. It’s scary but a blessing!!! And he LOVES dancing !! He sings and plays the drums and loves my passion for life and what I do in the world…so wonderful to have an engaged and present MAN!! We have another date on Thursday.
I walked away from my EUM end of last year. It was the HARDEST choice I have ever made to walk into the light of MY truth and say I dont want this anymore. I loved the guy and was so afraid to let go BUT I let go with love and kindness. Five months later I have been given Lex. He is 60! And has said he has been looking for a woman like me all his life…and you know I have to confess through my absolute shock that I have been looking for a MAN like him all my life and never believed he was out there. I am still pacing myself IN but the heart armour against the masculine (father) is coming down….”
All these women have one thing in common. They are done with the chasing boy energy. They cultivate their feminine magnetism by doing less. Yes, by doing and giving less. It’s counterintuitive, isn’t it? They make themselves the prize guys compete to bring home to. That’s what guys do, even if they tell you otherwise, they truly love challenges and competitions. Those get the adrenaline and testosterone running! Don’t take that away from them.
To learn more about how to captivate a man’s heart, here’s the new program that will ensure the smooth sail of your relationship without ever appearing pushy and desperate by bringing up the talk: Four Components Of Melting His Heart (that is responsible in getting my client Chrissy engaged to her boyfriend of 6 months!)
Are you having issues in your relationship and you don’t know where to go? Grab my book and resolve all those issues once and for all. And you will be included in the two lively private groups I own and see how women transform themselves there to become a high-value woman.
And sign up for my upcoming and recurring group coaching Leaning Back and Cultivating Feminine Mystique Workshop. I will reveal all the keys you need to melt a man’s resistance to commitment there.
You can also be irresistible like my client Kirstie and get him to step up and marry you after a breakup by attending my Journey Inward group coaching in which she will guest star and share her story of transformation from an alpha female with beta traits to become a beta female with alpha traits.
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Image credit Deposit Photo!